Urgent...

So the problem was worse than I thought!

So the Brother Sung-Man was supposed to share his tesimony like I said, and he seemed fine this morning, but whenever they called his name...well, he was no where to be found...yeah...later we found out he was in his "thinking place." Yeah, he said there was just too much pressure on him lately and he wasn't able to handle it...he usually hides his emotions by being the "funny guy." So he does a really good job of masking his aches and pains when deep down inside he's SCREAMING! So it was pretty awkward whenever he was called to come up and he wasn't there...and he came back later tonight...talk about awkward...I tried talking to him, but he just told me that various things were causing him to feel pressured...please pray for him. He's being pressured about creating a vision and he said he just doesn't know what He's supposed to do after this year...his uncle is really pressuring him to be a missionary in China with him, but he doesn't feel it's his calling...there are many other things, but he just needs some time to tell us...Please pray for him...

I also think it's because it's winter...I mean, it's called the dark ages back at the Academy for a reason...and I think it's the same here. The brothers are feeling the effects...because brother Sung-Man is not the only one...I had fellowship with brother Myung-Gun because he was wanting to leave ENM and I wasn't trying to persuade him to stay (even though he now wants to stay) but I merely explained my experiences and I was open to his thoughts and such. He told me about his life and I couldn't help but notice he was A LOT like me. Before he came to Christ he would try and find happiness...okay, so this is where we were different since I don't drink, but he would go out and get drunk and go to dance clubs and just pursue after girls and such, but he said he was never satisfied...yes, it was fun at the time, but he always wanted more and more. I asked him what made him happy...he said playing sports and watching movies and I asked him why...and it finally boiled down to it's because he loves spending time with people...JUST LIKE ME! but I have a meeting...will finish this

Know that I am praying for you! Yes, YOU, the reader!!!

I've pretty much recovered from my body imbalance/cold like symptoms = ) I definitely feel very good and joyful = )

Photos of the week are at the bottom = )

Please continue to pray for the people we reach out to and for those we are having fellowship with. Wang Bong for me so that I can continue to meet with him, and also for Leo so I can help him to know Christ better.

Please pray for the others here at ENM...some are thinking about taking a break from it because it's pretty tough...The rules can be pretty overwhelming at times...and also, the brothers have to worry about when they should go and serve in the Army...(required 2 years for unrestricted line/2 years and 2months for restricted line:ex.if you have flat feet or bad eyes you get to do some sort of community service instead of going to the DMZ) Just to inform those who don't know the type of schedule here...Mon-Fri wake up at 6 and exercise togther, have QT, quiz eachother on our memory verses, eat breakfast togther, either have fellowship, share our QT, witness, discussion about the current book we're reading (right now it's Transforming Grace by Jerry Bridges. And if you haven't read it, it's AMAZING so far. He's also the author of The Pursuit of Holiness...I think...but anywho, it's another great book I read with my Navs Bible Study group at the Academy), play soccer, basketball, badmitton, ping-pong, three cushion (Korean style pool), etc in order to also meet new people and share the Gospel. And when we do have some free time, we Can't watch movies without permission and we can't view online video sites like youtube and such or videogames online etc...it's so we can focus on disciplining ourselves (like I said before...I feel sort of like a Plebe again = P )But I absolutely LOVE the environment = ) LIke I said before, I would not mind AT ALL if God wanted me to be here longer...we'll see how things go

Besides reading Transforming Grace, I finished reading up on a book I received for my birthday from my director, it's called God's Grace to Nine Generations: it's by James Hudson Taylor III and it's about how the 1st James Hudson Taylor was the first Missionary to China and how his family remained in the Missionary Field and how God took care of them...very short book, easy read.
I'm on page 133 of Dr. SB Lee's book about his life and how he overcame...it's taking me awhile since it's in Korean, but it's very inspiring...if you know Dr. Lee, you definitely know where I'm coming from
I'm also readning The Present by Spencer Johnson...never heard it before, but I got it as a late birthday present from one of the brothers here and it's actually really good. It's about how to enjoy work and life NOW in the present, hence the name.
I was reading Joel Osteen's book about how to live a better life now, but I stopped reading it for various reasons...it seems kind of...but yeah, if you've read the book and thought it beneficial, you can tell me to continue to read it...otherwise, I'll continue to read other books
I'm also brushing up on my Korean and starting to learn some Han Jja, old Korean style Chinese characters (using some old books I got from my younger cousin...he finished these books 2 years ago...age 6 = P...Chinese characters are no joke...he's definitely got his fathers brain)and if I have time, looking at some words in Word Smart so I don't forget all of my English = P.


Our Apart Leader...He's studying for an English exam...if he does well, he doesn't have to serve in the military and he can instead pursue a PHD instead. It's funny because his name is the same as my sister's in Korean = P He's an amazing person...I've said this before, but he attends graduate school and still makes time to lead most all of our gathering and have man to man fellowships...he doesn't sleep much = O


I had the opportunity to see my cousins in Cheonan (an hour away) for lunch and dinner = ) The red book my cousin is holding is what I made for her back in October...yeah, a little late, but she likes it = ) I got my other cousin dominoes...he loves building stuff!





And for her I gave her some yummy snacks...she loves snacks! Whenever I came to Korea in July and saw her with my parents, she only liked my sister Esther, but then I gave her two older siblings fruit by the foot, she all ofa sudden came up to me and said "I like you! Give me [fruit by the foot]" lol I was like that as a kid, too...wait, I'm actually still like that...honestly...food attracts!!!


Up close and personal with our Campus Director at ENM. If I remember correctly, he graduated from Korea University with a masters and had a very good job working with Samsung or some big Korean company, but he quit his job to become the Campus Director at ENM. Some of his friends thought he was nuts, but he knows in his heart he was called to serve. We're sharing our QT lessons before we go out and spread the Gospel.




My project. We're waiting at the subway to go witness at Yonsei University. He's doing okay right now...he shares his testimony tomorrow at the ENM Service (roughly 250-300)He's kind of nervous...and he said he's going to tell everybody how I beat him...lol...it's because I push him to work out harder...and I give him limited portions of food = P But he knows it's for his own good...I stopped doing the diet with him because there was no way...yeah, work out a lot and eat little doesn't work too well for me



What also hasn't worked too well for me was little sleep...I tried not taking naps (our daily schedule time6am to midnight) but I can't function without sleeping in once in a while or taking naps...here's my "helper" brother...please pray for him as he is also having to decide about when to go to the Army...He's definitely an AWESOME "helper" to me. He always helps me if I need it and he even got me an MP3 player for my birthday = ) He helps me to want to be more generous to people like . Why I wanted to get a part time job. I barely work, but I don't know how some of the brothers here have a job and yet still devote as much time as they can to ENM...I honestly don't think I can do it now, but I'm working on it...hopefully I will also be able to bring it back with me to the Academy...and not be TOO BUSY...



I'm working on not being too busy...I just have a passion for many things...I'm doing better about it though = ) I still think I should keep in better contact with some of my friends/family, but part of the reason why I keep this blog is so I can "keep in contact" with them without spending too much time writing emails in my free time.

Oh, I'll be taking by PRT this Monday to send back to the Academy...hopefully I will do okay on it since they'll definitely take that into consideration as they consider my readmittance. I'll inform you how I do next time!

Live by love = )

Praying

Answer to the comment: No, they didn't surprise me with it...I knew around Christmas time we were going to start the book...I just told them it would be all right for me to read it in Korean = P I got the English version of Transforming Grace a couple of days ago...THANK GOODNESS...I got the gist in Korean, but yeah, reading it in English makes a lot more sense = P We just finished talking about chapter 3, but during the time we were discussing it, I went to the hospital = O But it's nothing serious...I think. I'll explain more below.

Yeah, I like the PT job right now...it's nice not feeling too much burden when I spend cash. I also don't like relying on other people for money when I can pretty easily sustain myself...I owe my parents and my sister a lot of mulah when I get back...and yes mom, dad, Esther, I do intend to pay you back = ) I got some money from other people too, but they were the HUGE contributors...I mean, A LOT. Because I found out so late I wanted to do this mission I didn't ask for financial support, just prayer. I am And it'll be that much easier to pay you guys back if I get accepted back to the Academy...with the 2nd class loan that is = P I have 2 more sheets to send in...statement of health, and my PRT scores...and then all I can do is pray...


This is breakfast on Saturdays (now that our soccer reservation was moved to Friday nights instead of Saturday morning for January)...Western Style! Apples, toast, strawberry jelly, eggs, ketchup, milk, and yes, those are Pop Tarts (my mom sent me a nice package of goodies full of "junk" food: fruit roll-ups, fruit-by-the-foot, beef jerky-which btw was DESTROYED at Incheon Airport by Customs...can't bring over American beef..., easy mac, and for some healthy stuff, multivitamins and power bars) Too bad I had to start being a personal trainer for brother Sung-Man...I think he got to eat a part of a fruit roll-up...and that's all I would allow him to eat = P I know, I'm evil...but the other brothers really appreciated it = ) They ate everything in 3 days...lol...





This is a picture of the campus ENM group who sang a "special song" at brother Sang-Gyu's wedding today!




Brother Sang-Gyu and his beautiful bride...she was also a sister here at ENM...they were introduced to eachother by one of the ENM directors 2 or 3 years ago...and after much prayer and time together, they got married = )



I put those pictures up because I promised more pics...I couldn't take more pictures throughout the week though because I was sick = (

So I thought I just had a cold...but the Dr. said my body's balace was/is thrown out of whack...so I told you I was helping brother Sung-Man lose weight...well, I also ate the same amount as him, but whenever I would work out with him, I would literally do 2 to 3 times what he did, and I have a higher metabolism than him, so I wasn't getting enough food to sustain my body...I felt signs of weakness starting on Friday, but yet I was still doing 2 a days with him...I honestly thought I could go through the pain, and just thought I was sore, but yeah, I got really sick starting Sunday morning...So I've been missing a lot of the discipling/witnessing the past week...I thought it was just a cold and just got some rest and took some cough medicine and boy was my apetite at an all time high! for 2 straight days I ate double the amount of what I normally eat (before doing the diet thing) I woke up at midnight two nights and ate a ton, then ate at 7 with the brothers, at 11 by myself, at 1:30 with the brothers, at 4:30 by myself, at 6:30 with the brothers....yeah, my body was craving food...anyway, I thought I was getting better, especially after going to a public bath/spa/sauna place (I weighed myself there...71 kilos! I was 79kilos in July!...that's like 16 lbs of weight loss) but after eating so much I'm like 162 lbs, but starting two days ago I got these overwhelming feelings of dizziness and weakness...yeah, so I just need to not be so extreme...I've found that to be true with my family...if we want to pursue after something, we really work hard to pursue it, but we can also pursure to do nothing which = extreme laziness or pursue to eat a lot which = gluttony...I[m working on it...to do things little by little bit everyday = )

Okay, I want to write more...but the brothers and I are going to the Directors house for dinner tonight! Yay for free and delicious food = )

Somebody commented that my face looked different...it's probably due to the fact I haven't cut my hair since July...here's a picture of me with my 4th b-day cake at my praise and worship meeting this past Saturday. Sang cut his hair TWICE and his hair is somehow still longer than mine!

And here's a picture of the gang with Dr. SB Lee after he got back from his honeymoon..his last night in Korea before heading back to the States with his wife = )

I will try to post more pics since that's probably what people want to see most...a picture is worth a thousand a words...

We've started reading Transforming Grace, and to be honest, it's taking me a LONG time to read it in Korean...my Bible Study leader said he ordered one for me in English, but it won't arrive for another week or so = O but what I have learned so far is that no matter what I do, I, myself, am not worthy without God's Grace. We need to open our hands so that God can give us more! He's trying to pour his grace upon us, but we want to go our own ways. If we would just discipline ourselves in order to make a bigger "bowl" we can "catch" more of God's grace!



I think this will encourage you! I asked my brothers to pray for me so that I can get a part-time tutoring job so that I can treat others/buy more gifts (so I could be more generous with my money) and I got a phone call from a lady asking for Anne Kim (my sister...I'm using her phone she had while she was in Korea last year for a semester abroad). She wanted a native English speaker as a tutor! So I didn't apply for any job, but I simply prayed and asked for prayer and because my sister had posted her resume online last year with her phone number on it, I got a part time tutoring job! Ahh, the power of prayer = ) It's three hours a week so it doesn't interfere with any of my training, plus, I am able to treat others more = )

I also received some snail mail from my family (Christmas and Birthday), and my sister put down that since I'm human, I would appreciate receiving a tangible greeting vice email/phone...she's right, I did appreciate it! I haven't sent out ANY cards or letters...I'm definitely going to because I now how good snail mail can make people feel...example: Plebe Summer.

Wow, I'm rambling...It's funny because I do the same in my journal...I wrote "I realy need to organize my thoughts better than this..."

So I mentioned I was a personal trainer, but didn't really go into debt. I'm helping one of the brothers here lose 3 kg (6.2 lbs) in two months. I know that sounds easy, but he's pretty big into eating and not so much into moving...so it's kind of hard...If you have any suggestions, please comment or email me, but for now this is what I'm doing (doing it with him so he doesn't get discoraged or make excuses that he's the only one "suffering") We did a juice diet one day...just juice instead of food. We run every morning (well, that's part of living here at ENM anyway, but he would mostly walk) and I push him to run longer, have him also do strength training which he rarely ever did before (pullups, situps, pushups, dips, etc) and other sports such as soccer for fellowship purposes (we have been playing sports anyway...inviting people to play sports with us in order to spread the gospel, exercise, and have fun fellowship together) So it's actually good for me to because I'm eating slower and less, not just stuffing myself like I usually do. I gave him some rules: no eating after 9pm, can only nap if it's 2 hours after finishing a meal, no snacks without my permission, and he has to listen to EVERYTHING I tell him to do...that's the tough one...because he's 3 years older than me and the culture in Korea is like the military...it's like a plebe helping out a firstie...yeah...I gave him some verses to help him (even though he already knew them before hand...he has memorized A LOT more verses than me...)1 Cor 9:27, Proverbs 27:17, Phil 4:13
Here's a funny picture of him
"before" (with my BCG's on lol): sorry it's sideways..
.I can't flip it and post it to blogger for some reason
...the korean picture program doesn't go well with
blogger...

He's the funny man of the group = ) lol He really can make anbody laugh


"After" to be posted in approx. 2 months

Pray that I will be able to keep him accountable and pray that I myself won't fall into temptation:laziness, gluttony...

Oh, and I'm also trying to quit my habit of pulling at my hair! I told my accountability partner to hit me anytime he saw me do it (sound familiar Esther = P )and everytime I think about doing it, I have challenged myself to think of God's grace instead and pray.

Witnessing is going well...we went to Yonsei University yesterday and Korea University today...most were open to the Gospel, got shoed away a couple of times, but to be honest, I'm not ashamed of the Gospel because it's the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes. And as I said before, planting the seed, but for those I see promise in or those who are willing, I meet with and help them grow in Christ. I will be meeting Wang-Bong tomorrow (he loves playing sports with us...still yet to accept Christ, but just as Christ gave us free choice, I don't burden him to believe, I merely show him how I live and how I'm joyful) Last night in our prayer meeting we prayed for different ENM missionaries around the world, and I ask that you particularly pray for the missionaries in China...while our Apart leader was explaining to us the packet of prayer requests he handed out, he told us when/if (when a new one comes out) we threw the packet away, to be sure to rip it up so that the names of the missionaries wouldn't somehow get in the wrong hands in China...yeah...It made me think about getting the secret clearance info on my hull cruise and subtramid...made me feel kind of, I don't know,...important = P

I really want to continue writing because this really helps me to relax and hopefully encourage you, the reader, but I really need to continue with my discipleship 훈련.

Evalutation/Progress report of my original goals that I posted in September:

First, HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Second, Congratulations to Dr. SB Lee!

Sang and I wanted to be a part of that so bad...

It was a beautiful wedding! over 500 friends and family came.

And because of the wedding I got to see Sang and Ron Koehler, the director of Navigators at the Academy! It is always nice to spend time with someone who is so Godly!












"*To know and reflect Christ in my daily life and to make Him known to others -- to the students at Korea Unversity and my relatives who do not believe: My grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins"

I am slowly making progress in this...witnessing is not easy, but through prayer I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me. I have shared the Gospel to many here and still meet with the select few who I feel, through prayer and God's saving grace, will be able to lead others in the future. 2 Tim 2:2

Also expanded to Konkuk University, and starting today Yonsei University.

**Please pray that I will continue to lead others, including my relatives, to Christ through prayer and by showing them Jesus' Love...

"*To be disciplined in my daily activities -- Quiet Time, praise, worship, prayer, studying, memorizing Bible verses, exercising, etc, following the Bible verse Colossians 3:23 'Work at it with all of you heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.' "

Living here has definitely helped me discipline myself, but I'm still being tempted with greed in the form of money, praise, food, sleep, etc. I need to continue disciplining myself so that I listen to the Holy Spirit, instead of my fleshly desires, so that I won't be a hypocrite witnessing. 1 Cor. 9:27

*To start an English Praise Team in hopes of bringing a larger audience to Christ -- work on my singing and maybe even learn how to play the guitar or drums

Every Saturday and Sunday I donate my time to teach others English. 2 hours on Saturday I teach with 2 other Koreans dialogues and idioms. 1 hour on Sunday I lead praise in English and an English Bible study focusing on pronunciation, accent/stress, and intonation.

I'm also part of the campus praise team here called "하늘소리" (Heavenly Voice) which meets every Saturday for 3 hours praising and praying.
I am currently trying to learn the guitar on my own...not very successfully, but starting this Saturday and every Saturday after, a fellow brother here at ENM is donating his time to teach others how to play the guitar.

"*To always make time for others!"To keep accountability with my other brothers"

I am not my own...I'm a part of the Body of Christ so I need to help others in the areas that God has blessed me with. I am helping others get into shape by working out/playing sports with them, teaching them English, and I feel God has blessed me with a personality compatible with most people so that I can help encourage them/have fellowship with them...to be there for them when they need somebody to talk to.

I have a pretty deep man to man talk once a week with my Bible Study leader, which can last for hours...how life is going, struggles, our plans to overcome, accountability on memory verses, etc. Also have accountability with my Apart Leader (this place we live at ENM is called Apart, not to be confused with Apartment, because we live apart from the desirable standards of the world...living in the world, but not living of it) and basically my "helper" brother...Ron, if you're reading this, you know who I'm talking about.

"*To be completely fluent in Korean"
"Completely" may be to strong of a word, but I'm working on it. In my free time I am reading a Korean book and memorizing some words. I took a 10 week long language course but currently am not because it would take away from my training with ENM.

The reason I post this blog is to keep you informed of what God has called me to do and also to hopefully encourage you to live with a purpose = )


I also celebrated my 21st birthday here! I had a preliminary cake with my team on Sunday



On January 2nd at 10:30 pm we were going to gather and have an Apart evaluation, but some people came in late...we have to come in by 10, so it was weird that the Apart leader didn't know where these other brothers were. He was concerned, called them, said they wouldn't answer, and then all of a sudden said how the room we were meeting in, my room, was too messy to have a meeting...I was like, sorry, I'll clean up my stuff, but we moved to the next room and lo and behold a surprise birthday party!

I would post some of the pics, but as a joke I was wearing by BCG's and making obnoxious faces the whole time and the fact that the pictures don't show all of the decorations or food = P I wish I could upload the video...I've taken a lot of video here but haven't had time to upload it.

The brother's bought lots of snacks and a cake and decorated the room with balloons and streamers. It was very nice.




I received a nice hand made diary: Tiger B is my team...left of M means Discipleship Training, below fish is "Heavenly Voice" Praise Team name and made by Jeh Kook.

I received a total of 3 birthday cake celebrations = )

Okay, I really need to read now!